The voice inside your head...
Today I will be exploring “Self Talk”, not the mental chitter-chatter we have about others but the inner conversations we have with ourselves about ourselves.
Often we are our worst enemies; judging ourselves more than we judge others, speaking worse about ourselves than we would to others, pressurising ourselves more than we would others. These are particularly ‘heightened’ times and pure breeding ground, for some of us, to become a little too hard upon ourselves. Whether that be with our role as a mother, father, sibling, friend, boss, colleague, or even with our entity of trying to be a ‘healthy, happy human being.’
As we are beings with unlimited potential, it can often feel like a never-ending treadmill of things we want to do, become and accomplish, with ourselves, in our family and social circles, and with our work endeavors. You may find yourself questioning whether you are working hard enough, achieving enough, supporting others enough, or looking after our wellbeing enough? Therefore, leaving you suspended in this ‘not enough’ mentality.
Well, I can assure you, if you are feeling your doing you are best (which maybe 20 out of 100 today), then that is enough. And even if you are not at your best, as I mentioned the other week in ‘feel all the feels,’ that is okay too. For some, they don’t even get to the point of looking for ‘completion’ or ‘ticking things off the list’ as they feel paralysed with overwhelm and find it hard even to start.
Either way, with all of this on our mind, we must be mindful of how we speak to ourselves. Do you fill your mind with encouraging, self-motivating thoughts or disgruntled self-deprecating thoughts? Are you honest with thoughts and feelings? Do you quieten your mind enough so you can even listen to them? Do you make excuses for yourself? Are you in a perpetual or fluctuating state of anxious thoughts? Our mind is so powerful so, let us be a little more mindful of it.
The thoughts you feed...
Once there was an elderly Cherokee who told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, “my son, the battle is between two ‘wolves’ inside us all. One wolf is filled with anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, self-doubt, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, superiority, and ego.
The other wolf is filled with joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf wins?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “the one that you feed.”
The power of words...
Let us spend this week noticing our ‘self-talk.’ Try using positive, empowering mantras such as:
I am alive and well
I am enough
I am beautiful
I am exactly where I need to be
I am whole and complete
I am worthy of greatness
I am doing my best
I am blessed
I am on track
I am loved
How to use them...
To find one which you can connect with, sit comfortably, close your eyes, take a big breath in through the nose, and let it out through the mouth.
Return to breathing through the nose slowly and observe your inner voice for a few minutes.
Start silently reciting, “I am… ” and see what comes to mind.
Explore different affirmations that either relax you, centre you, or make you feel better about yourself and your life. “I am” is an effective opening for an affirmation (it’s direct and unwavering,) but your positive power mantra can be anything concise and holds meaning to you.
During your exploration, if one doesn’t resonate with you, let it go, until you find one that does.
Once you’ve settled upon one sit with it for a few minutes, silently repeating it to yourself. Take another big breath through the nose and out through the mouth, open your eyes.
Throughout your day, continue to be mindful of your thoughts and keep returning to your chosen mantra. Use it to cut through any of that negative self-talk. Use it to keep you grounded in the present moment and in an appreciative, abundant mindset. You can even use it during your meditation and yoga practice. Soften your heart and talk to yourself from a place of love and kindness, and let those inner self chats be ones that ease and uplift you.
Peace and love,